hahaha. changed blogskin :D
another day passed. i'm suppossed to go for the Singapore Food Race today, and report to school by 9.15am. when i woke up, it was already 9.05am. i rushed like mad, from the bathroom to my room, from my room to the kitchen, from the kitchen and out to the bus stop. in the end, the thing was cancelled. so stupid la. thn went out wth qianyi to lot one, thn west mall. bought my handphone strap and pouch. the xiao jie at the stall was so friendly despite it was her first day at work there! :D

anyway, i don't understand leh. i really don't leh. didn't the media commercialised that teens should share their views about matters openly? if i were to truthfully tell my parents that i ever had a thinking of killing people (i shall not say who the people refers to), will they actually ''understand'' my thinking and how i felt and WHY did i think that way? i doubt so. will they uncover the reason behind why would i have that thinking? i doubt so too. i truly don't think that too much reprimanding benefits the child in anyway. i personally feel that a parent should first understand the reason behind why the child did that particular mistake, or said certain things the child is not suppossed to say. maybe it's their age, maybe it's their adaptation to the modern youth society that makes them annoying to some youths when they reprimand them. perhaps paents may think that scolding/embarrassing their child infront of his/her friends will make the child know their mistake and change for the better. but there ARE negatives on using this method on some youths. a deep hatred towards the parent will develop. in my case, i developed hatreds towards my parents and my sibling, for different reasons, for different occasions, for different logics, for different thinkings and opinions. there always will be conflict in my family, ALWAYS.

i was thinking to myself, if i did too much of everything, that FORCED them to kep reprimanding me and make me super fed-up and pissed. perhaps i really did too much, too much of chatting on the phone, too much of text messaging, too much of computer gaming, too much of studying, too much of hanging out till late at night, too much of hanging out with guys, but NEVER too much of going out with girls. i cried over this matter upteen times. although i know it's stupid, but i can't control these emotions when i'm restricted in things that i wanna do. and i realised that when one parent is not around and one is, the one that is AROUND, will often push the blame to the other party when the kaobei-er (which is me) is .. kaobei-ing about something. actions that the party that is often NOT AROUND do when the party that is AROUND tells him what the brat(s) have done today, (either talking back, come back late at night, talking on the phone seriously long, audition whole day instead of doing homework) have ACTUALLY caused the party that is often AROUND to do the same actions too. like self-inflicting, self-blaming, destroy home appliances on/with the human body. it's an utterly stupid behavious of the party that is often AROUND. when the kaobei-er talks nicely. ( okay i should not nicely, in a sarcastic NORMAL tone), the party gets pissed and irritated by the sarcastic comments on her thoughts and feelings, THUS does the actions that the party that is often NOT AROUND does.

yeap, it's the world of the 21st century adults in MY family. i ever envied my friends' parents who were so friendly to his/her friends, not judging them by their acadamic results, not judging them by their sex, but judge them by their character, and by getting to know them better, socialising with them. parents who actively help out on their child's class activities, who is up-to-date with technology, who is willing to lend a listening ear to their child/children, and giving them thoughtful advices. mayb that is what my ideal parent is, but the sad thing is that we can't choose our parents. so just live with it, or don't give a damn about them.

i doooont understand adults of their thinking, i can literally faint. they can't look at things/matters/situations at another angle, can they?